A step towards serenity. Hopefully...

Salam. now I'm a bit messed up right here. I guess I gotta pull out some of whats in my head to 'Ordinary Eyh??'.

K.. so.. u know how sometimes we want somethg so much, n we will be like, "I wanna do this!! I must do this!!" or "I want this!! I must have this for myself" Yeah!!!!

But what if what we r doing (/wanna do) is unbeneficial (or worse, it's the wrong thing to do!!). These things usually lead to the negative side. even sitting around wasting our time is like a crime. yeh know what I mean??

but then.. while I was in the middle of this dilemma, there's like a voice. A nice.. soft... voice... asking me to be patient... and be strong.... hmm.. I know as a muslimah, I gotta hold on!! N I felt like.. yeah.. u r right Mr Voice. But then Mr Voice continued... He said tht the Earth is not forever n we gotta work things out as our preparation for the final abode, the hereafter. yeaah.. ur right Mr Voice. jazakAllah.

N my mind went around and around and still.. it is around.. somewhere. which was why I decided to write here!!

hmm... y is it so hard for me to take this the right way. I prefer to be patient n wait for whatever I want to be right in front of my eyes, rather than to be patient in striving for Allah's blessings. Astaghfirullah. Tht's so not the way it should be.

Gotta straighten myself up! tie a knot to my iman, so that I wont lose it. but how?? y does this mind goes back to what I'm trying to avoid? how do we leave a bad habit eyh? I wonder............................

n now I rmb what my sister said:
...trying to resist doing things you enjoy doing; going online, watching movies, talking, joking, eating, sleeping… Sometimes you feel like giving up. Why am I killing myself with these books and lecture notes?? And exams!! Then again, you’ve got to remember, you are where you stand for a reason, a reason that you might not be certain of, but God knows. So hang in there, you’ve got to be strong. Just do your best and leave the rest to God. You’re a good person, you love God, and He loves you back. Whatever happens, it is because He wills it to happen. He is testing you, whether you’ll come to Him, or sail away…

yikes! ur absolutely right. Words of advice from my darling sister.. awwwwwwwwwww......... I'm touched. Her words refreshes my spirit to strive towards Allah's blessings. Alhamdulillah. I luv u Allah!!!! N I luv u my sister!!!!

PS: sometimes we do wrong things to solve our problems, when such wrong doings are unnecessary. U can live without it! Believe in Islam as the way of life. Yeahhh!!! =)