Kafir

I was attending my first uskab (usrah kabilah) juz now.. It was short but very meaningful. Let me share it with u...

We did tadabbur on surah al-Kahfi (100-110). Come my fellow muslims, open up ur quran right now!!

hmm... at first we talked abt Jahannam. ok. so, jahannam is such a big horror word for those who actually realize it. I mean.. u couldnt even imagine such horror, such torture, terrible, terrible torture in that place. For who??? for those who are kafir. Nauzubillahiminzalik.

We learned the characteristics of the kafir. I rmber these 3 points.

1) The kafir have closed eyes and the kafir doesnt listen. Ok. What does this mean? From what I understand.. the kafir doesnt wanna accept the truth of Islam. He refuses to look at the greatness of Allah and refuses to listen to the rightful truth.

2) The kafir takes shelter from other than Allah. Example. to depend on other than Allah. when we get sick, straight to the doctor's. not to Allah. The doctor gives u recovery or Allah recovers u? Think2!! Allah of course!! the visit to the doctor's is only ur effort to heal urself. when the healing happens only biiznillah.

3) The kafir does good. charity for example. but what he does was such a wastage. maybe bacause he hopes for the respect of others or for compliments. Such a waste!! he thinks tht he does good, when Allah does not count those charity since it was not LILLAHITAALA. juz doing it for urself to get the credits is a NOkie dokie!

y is this so meaningful 2 me? because Allah is really conversating with me.

I know tht Allah gives the best for me in all situation. It's as if Allah is asking me.. Is it so difficult to accept tht Allah knows what's best for u??

I plan and plan and plan.. but Allah is the best planner. It's as if Allah is asking me.. Is it so difficult to put ur trust in Allah??

I know how important the niat is and how we humans have to deal with distractions in order to protect our niat LILLAHITAALA. yes. It's as if Allah is asking me.. What exactly do u want out of all of ur doings?? What do u want Lydia??

Oh Allah. I dont want to be kafir. I dont. nauzubillahiminzalik.